LOVE and RELATIONSHIPS

When it comes to men and relationships, you have never heard enough, but the funny thing about problems with relationships is that you hear the same stories told by different folks over and over again.

We have all felt like we will never find love at one time or another, so you are not alone. But if you feel this way right now, you must understand that there is work for you to do in the meantime, the work of taking care of your business. Taking care of yourself applies to establishing what it is that you want, but it also applies to knowing who you are. Before finding love and before having fun, be sure to prioritize your business. There will always be people around to hang out with, to go play with, but those same people may never make it to a stage of success in life. Some people never take care of business, but they have a blast, it’s true. So, by all means, if it is your primary goal to have fun in life, do what it is that allows you to have fun. However, only those who have determined the fact that the real fun is establishing a successful life for themselves will be there with you enjoying the rewards of perseverance.

On the road to taking care of our business, it is very important for each of us to carry ourselves with dignity and respect. Others are either going to respect you or they are not, and whether or not you have their respect will be based upon what you demand from them. It has always been important to me to hold myself in high regard. I always thought that the kind of young man that I am attracted to likes a woman who is confident and smart and who takes care of her business. The key to that last statement was that this would be the kind of man that I was attracted to in return. It never made much sense to me to be the prettiest girl in school with a D average. To be the complete package was always the goal for me.

 

DON’T GET STUCK

Many people go through life without knowing that they have been in a constant state for much too long. Several people are unhappy with themselves or their partners, their jobs or their choices, but in many cases they do not see themselves as others see them. One day, while out running errands, I decided to drop by a friend’s office. I knew several of the employees because I was an independent contractor for this company. I joined a few of the staff in the lunchroom, and we got into a conversation about life and making changes. I had not seen them in quite some time because I had been out taking care of me, but on this occasion a young man and I got into a conversation.

We talked and talked about how things sometimes happen in life that we are not prepared for. The young man had just gone through a hard time due to the loss of his grandfather and a neighbor. He was at an interesting place in his life, which had led him to think about what changes he needed to make to really find happiness. From my previous conversation with some of the employees in the lunchroom, he learned that I too had gone through a few of those kinds of experiences in my life that forced me to wake up and stop taking time for granted. He asked me questions about what it was that I wanted to do, and he was very excited for me. It was as if he had just found a friend on his same path. I was very excited while talking to him as well, because he had taken that step toward finding his happiness.

This young man shared with me that he just woke up one day and it was like the last eleven years had passed him by. He shared that he wanted to confront some of his fears and even consider some other avenues as far as his career was concerned. One of the greatest points in this conversation was that he recognized his need to be spiritually prepared to make the kinds of changes that he wanted to make. The truth of the matter is that nothing about altering your life is easy, but sometimes you just have to step out on faith. You have to believe that you have been awakened to see the light in your own life for a reason and that it is up to you to make the changes. Believing that you are making the best decision also ties into believing that God will be your strength. With that faith, there is nothing that could go wrong. You will be confronted by challenges, but because of those challenges you will recognize your growth, learn valuable lessons, and be that much closer to more wonderful opportunities.

 

REACH YOUR PASSION

This is my formula for reaching your passion, and it usually starts with the end in mind. The beginning of the process is to think about what you want in your life as opposed to your current situation. Once you are able to visualize and verbalize what it is that you want, whether it is realistic or not, your attention is captured by that desire. Because something seems more like a dream than reality does not mean that it is not possible, and in fact, if you want something badly enough, it becomes a dream. After being able to clarify what it is that you want, you become motivated by that thought. The more time you spend thinking about the place or thing desired, the more excited you become about it. Excitement comes when you begin to own the result or desire and believe that you deserve it. The dream becomes real. Excitement leads to more thinking and planning. The process of planning helps you to explore what needs to be done and how it could be done, which ultimately puts the goal within your reach. Once you work out a plan, you discover the possibilities—you discover the reality. And finally, the excitement drives you to take action. That action or drive transports you to your dreams, your passion. Motivation is a vehicle that drives you to your passion. So, specifically, what drives you?